Just keep BRAINS!

Cemetary-Travels and the life of a german Darkling.

Category: personal

WAR-drobe stories (aka building a goth wardrobe pt. 1, boots & shoes)

Hey there, Internet!

It happened. And that a lot lately. Emails and PMs asking how much I spent on my wardrobe so far and if there would be some advice I could give for building a gothy wardrobe. At first that question got me pretty much confused (or more the fact that it appeared more than once or twice lately), I have seen some of those guides before but thought they would be some nice inspiration when you got too confused in your wardrobe and maybe needed some inspiration or motivation for changing a bit or for clearing your wardrobe rather than being an actual guide on how to start dressing a special way but while talking to those lovely baby bats ( ❤ ) they indeed were asking how I would start to change my wardrobe / clothing jewelry these days and how I did ‘back then’ when my fabrics turned black, when I was on my pupils budged / pocket money. Telling me that today there is so much to shop that it is simply confusing for someone who just found their love for the darker subcultures. Got me thinking for a while.

So I found my first ‘bat family’ when I was just 11 years old. Back then (1998) there were not so many and easy to find goth stores, maybe when you were living in big cities but not in a tiny town like the one where I grew up. And online shopping? We barely had internet over here in Germany. I was happy for the ‘eldergoths’ who took care of me. Even though we did not have that word back then, simply amazing creatures who were 10 to 20 years older than me, some were in the punk or goth subculture for 10 years or more, they enjoyed taking care of that little girl over here so I got some help and inspiration for my DIY projects or sometimes I would even get a piece of clothing or accessorie, new or handmedown as present, lucky! Talking about being lucky, I was totally in love with the designs of Lip Service so when I learned about online shopping and after a lot of begging my mom sometimes would let me use her credit card for a USA lip service order!

Note: I did have some color phases when I tried to mix a piece or two into my wardrobe. Did not work for me but a girl has to try what a girl wants to try. If you like some of your ‘mainstream’ clothes who would have the right to tell you to throw them away? Nobody. And if you want to dress like a happy rainbow glitter faerie so please do it. Clothes should make you happy. I actually do have some friends who are still the gothiest person on earth in their hearts but due to job restrictions or issues their kids had at school because of their darkling parents or because they found their love for some color they changed their style to something more mainstream. Some would still throw on their gothy stuff and tease their hair on the weekends, some would not. Still friends. So stay with the people who adore you for the person inside of you, not for what you wear.

Whatever, after I thought about that topic for a while I thought I would do a small series on this blog (and while doing so, maybe take a closer look at my wardrobe – you know those moments that you realize you have too much of this or are missing that? Let me see what is hiding in the corners – even though I usually dig through my stuff once a year and sell what hasn’t been worn. Unless my heart is connected to it, of course.)

1703 wardrobestories gothicclothing shoeandboots collection ironfistwebs docmartens solovair 1703 wardrobestories gothclothing shoesandboots docmartenswhite work corporate

those that will remain: Iron Fists Walking in my Web Heavy Sole Boots, Doc Martens patent leather 20-hole boots, Solovair 8-hole stompy leather boots with steel cap. Right pic are my working boots, white 8-hole Doc Martens. All the other shoes and boots don’t get enough love and hence will face ebay soon, yay for some empty space in my wardrobe!

So when I started the first thing I wanted were shoes. Before, I was wearing Buffalo plateau shoes, blue and white, they were the only ones available in my size (EU41.5 / UK 8 / US10-11). Did I mention how horrible the shopping situation was? In the beginning I even used a sharpie to paint them black. For shopping some shoes you should know your feet and what style you currently shop for and what style you would like to go for. Someone who is more into 80s/90s goth might want to buy different boots than those who enjoy fetish, military, cyber or lolita. My advice would always be to start a pinterest or moodboard, we do have the technical advances of the internet so we should use it! Most companies these days have shoes made from leather and vegan alternatives for some of their designs as well.

My very first gothy boots were Doc Martens. Nothing is ever wrong with simple black stompy boots. Perfect for clubbing nights, days on the town, spent in nature or actually I think for everything. Even with a ballgown, let them stare, they probably never will understand how comfy they are once the blister days are over! I buy a new black 8-hole pair every 3-5 years and also have a white pair for work and a 20-hole pair in shiny black pvc as well as maybe 2-3 on my wishlist that I am sure I will never actually buy anyways. I am not a huge shoe collector, really I usually only have like 6 or 7 pairs at the same time – even my exes did have more shoes than me.

I then wanted a pair of heels, never wore high heels before, they hurt my feet, were super expensive and I hated them, even though they did look amazing and made my booty look not so much like that early, tiny teenage girl that I was but more like a womans, wasn’t worth it for me. New Rocks in Black / Purple if I’m not mistaken, I never even liked purple, they are no longer with me like so many other shoes afterwards. Today I do understand that my feet need plateau soles in heels and better have thick heels or none than those tiny spiky ones, I have 2 pairs of Jeffrey Campbell heels, they do feel amazing (Lita Night Spikes – those that look like unicorn feet with spikes – and Litas in black fishnets) and I sometimes wear them at home or when visiting friends or for photos or when I am sure there will be no uneven ground and no alcohol at an event. If the ground is not even I can’t dance in them. When I’m drunk I get clumsy and simply fall down. I still drool over some New Rocks, Fantasma or Hades heels but I know they would spend more time in a corner of my flat than on my feet so that is not going to happen unless I win the lottery. When you adore the metal heels of New Rocks, they also come with heels that are less extreme and Demonias latest collection has some metal heels as well and they have some really pretty plateau boots and shoes in general!

Oh and while we are talking about things that maybe will never happen, Wellington boots! Even in the worst rain I will stick to my Docs, lately there appeared some beautiful designs though, with skull/roses prints or in black with military inspired lacing on top of the rubber, those could convince me, maybe. Sandals will probably never be a part of my collection either, the shoes with less fabric in my collection already don’t get enough love because I hate when my feet get cold. 40°C in summer? You will still find me wearing my boots. Thinking about some of those black jelly sandals or flipflops for the swimming pool though. My sport shoes gave up a while ago so I currently stick to my stompy boots but my previous ones usually were Capezio or Asics.

As for lolita girls or any other playful female styles you might find the ones you like with TUK but be careful with the zippers, I killed some of my blackmilk leggings with them (three pairs of TUKs have been in my collection that I remember, we don’t like each other, they won’t last long for me but I have friends who love them and say they are lasting forever while their Demonias broke fast – those last forever for me though, they also do have some nice Mary Janes available.)

And of course, every 80s/90s goths favourite Winklepickers, these lately seem to be everywhere again as well which I consider a good thing. Remember my post about The Gothic Shoe Company? I learned that my feet feel cold in my pair and probably will sell them and get a boot-kind-of pair. BTW, I’m wondering why they never replied to my questions…?

Another brand you could browse would be Iron Fist, last time I checked they would not ship directly to Germany though but you can easily get most pairs at resellers like attitude, beserk, find them on ebay or amazon. Lately Killstar released their first collection of shoes as well! Tempted to buy a pair but those heels, trying to resist over here! When you are afraid of online shopping though you might find something for your needs in town as well, if the boots are too boring for your likings try adding some spikes, spiderweb or bat paints or exchange the laces with chains! For the people who prefer soft fabrics even chucks can look good, depending on how you style them!

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So my collection is now cut in half, these will head to ebay: Demonia Sprite01, my Winklepickers, Jeffrey Campbell Fishnet Litas and Lita Night Spikes (Unicorn shoes)

Uh, so my shopping list now has black jelly sandals on it, two different pairs of Demonia boots (Clash 430, Sinister 203) as well as a new pair of Capezio dancesneakers and maybe, if lucky enough to find them in my size (EU41.5/UK8/US10) the YRU Qloud Gis. And I threw some of the shoes to an ebay pile that won’t be worn anyways because of cold feet. No matter how beautiful they are, shoes are made for walking, dancing and simply to be worn, not as decoration! I think that’s not too much for a wishlist though!

What are your preferences in shoes / boots? How did you start you collection? What is currently on your wishlist? Have a nice evening!

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Hair(-care) Update! Bleaching back to blonde! Daddy oh!

Hey there, Internet!

Talking about regrets? As much as I was convinced to stay with my lately black dyed hair I now wish I didn’t do that. I noticed I looked like a young version of my mom, which is ok since we don’t have any problems but really I like to look like myself instead of like another already existing person. So I thought that I would go back to the platina blonde hair that I also enjoyed for some times, back in 2011/2012 I think. Back then I had colorful dip dyes, might do that again at a certain length.

1610 fotd selfie gothgoth makeup glasses fledermausbrille pentacle tattoo pentagram piercings goth hair platina bleach pale haircolor purple dipdye blonde braid manic panic

left: nearly black hair / offblack, nice but I don’t want to be a copy of my mom. center: back then when I had platin blonde hair (oooh, look how pale it made my skin look like!) which I changed because I wanted to grow it longer, right: colorful dipdye, might do this again once the platin blonde parts are long enough.

While 9% bleach definitely is good enough for my naturally nearly black hair it seemed I needed something more for the black dyed parts, did 3 bleachings with 12%, roots and some different parts each time so I would not end with dry, plastic like, fried hair. After the 3 times I reached a point where my hair won’t get enough lighter compared to the damage it would take so no more bleach for the lengths. Only going to bleach the roots from now on.

When I decided to go for the black hair a few months ago I wasn’t sure if I wanted black or platin blonde hair because I liked both when I had them a few years earlier. Black or dark dyes won’t damage your hair as much as bleaching will, that’s what caused my decision. Then again I use argan and coconut oils for my hair-care-days (aka every day to the tips and every three days on the entire hair) which makes colorful hair as well as dark hair easily look strange, dull, oily and so on. When I had blonde hair though it was fine. The dip dyes only lasted for a short amount of time anyways so that was ok as well.

These days a lot of people go for white or silver hair, I doubt it would suit me since first lines appear, so for me there is no need for using white toners. What I use to get my hair a little less yellow-looking is Lush’s pigmented Daddy-O shampoo which was made for exactly that, blonde hair and has an amazing scent of violets, bergamot and roses that will last for the exact time I have in between my washing days! No additional toners or conditioners needed these days, Daddy-O and argan / coconut oils give my hair all the required care.

By the point that my roots were the color I wanted for my entire hair and that I cut off the dry ends I felt that the still outgrowing part did look strange. Off to pinterest (see my hairgasm board) again and found a lot of haircuts that I thought would look nice while growing the shorter hair out. Slowly cut until my hair was shoulder length and probably now will simply let them grow this way as long as possible while keeping the platin blonde, maybe the darker blonde parts will get some dip dye because black, copper or green tips definitely would look nicer than dark blonde. So maybe the black dye wasn’t the worst thing that could have happened, at least I now am able to properly grow my hair the same length which I think will be done by my birthday / by WGT 2017 and afterwards I’ll try how long I can get it to grow without breaking too bad.

Previous hair posts? Paul Mitchell, how to maintain bright colored hair, Suddenly Misty

How about you, any plans with your hair? Achieved your hair goal? Found your Holy grails? Have a nice evening! Oh and, you’re tagged!

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Batfit 16-09 & Gear review weighted gloves by ‘Mov it’

Hey there, Internet!

* Batfit is a ‘challenge group’ by our dear Professor Z where all kind of (darkly inclined) people try to motivate each other to get healthier or change / do whatever in their lives to feel better.

Health update: Pain is still down on a level I can take. No painkiller since August, 4th!

Emotional update: Back to normal. Of course there are some bad moments, I am human but not as bad as last month!

Body update: currently at 75kgs, going down – hoping to reach the ‘6s’ this year!

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I think this is quite some good changes, really looking forwards to the next few months to see how close I can get to my 23/25-yr-old stomach!

Workout update: Still 1hr / 4days each week. Afterwards covered in more salty water than any ocean can offer and with a skin more red than any sunburnt person I’ve seen this year.

Gear upgrade: I already mentioned this in the Batfit Facebook group, this month I got some 2kgs weighted gloves from Amazon. Actually wanted to get bigger weights than the tiny 2kg ones I currently use but since the others seem to have different materials as middle part, which is simply perfect on mine (no sweat, no nothing) gloves were my choice this time. Started adding them on a day off work because first time with new gear I like to start with double time and time to rest afterwards! I still only managed to go through half of my workout but this made me set this months short term goal!

1610 batfit gothic fitness health weightedgloves movit review

Short review: I bought the Mov it (Power and vitality) 2kg weightd gloves / wristbands from Amazon. They had mixed reviews but with 9.99€ I could not resist. They were available in three colors (red, blue and black – of course went with black) in 4 different weights (0.5kgs-2kgs, filling depends on what size you buy), fabric is neoprene and I hope maybe this will prevent sweat from sticking inside so they won’t smell bad after a few times of use. Some reviews mentioned sand falling out of their weights but since 2kgs are not filled with sand I can’t tell if this is what you get with the less heavy ones, mine arrived in a good condition. The Velcro closure is nice but I have tiny wrists so they are a bit loose on me, could fix with the thumb loop but those feel too tight and the fabric here is a bit rough on my skin. Still I am happy with them and for that kind of money I think it is a good investment in building muscles on my arms and I think I will do some researches on other gadgeds that might or might not help with my long term goals!

September Batfit goal: Go through entire workout with the weighted gloves. Achieved but probably will have to start at the beginning again when house moving thing is done because when working nightshifts, then driving 3hrs to attend a flat viewing and apply for it, then driving back 5 or more hours because of traffic jam your freetime activity  is trying to get some sleep in your car and decide if you want fries or coleslaw for dinner…

Who else is on batfit or maybe any other groups to get healthy / happy? Have a nice evening!

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Random 16-09

Hey there, Internet!

Monthly Post of Random Pictures / Thoughts & Questions / Links and other things that happened during the past month (or since writing last random post) and would not fit into another post…

1609 pumpkinspicelatte psl starbucks gothsinhotweather summertoautumn germany 1609 random goth tattooedgirl pokemon pentacle fledermausbrille glasses mua shavedhead germany 1609 shadow rippedfabric gothic art

left: Pumpkin spice latte transitioned to a frappucchino because it is that time of year again but far too hot for a regular coffee! center: Job and flat hunt is keeping me busy but I refuse to transition to a no-makeup & jogging pants look. right: Sometimes it is the tiny things you enjoy, ripped fabric that randomly creates pretty shadows on your walls for example!

Maybe these thoughts / questions would be useful as inspiration or someone knows the answer? (If none of these, hopefully at least they would be entertaining.)

list-bat-png So I bought my new hairdyes on eBay just to find one tube has already been opened. that and paying 10GBP shipping for each item bought while they send all in one package… No communication with the seller or they at least won’t answer. Not so happy but the only place I currently know about where I can buy the dyes these days.
list-bat-png 2016 obviously is a year when, once again, the quality of Halloween decoration that is available here in Germany, has increased. Due to moving and my ‘kind of’ shopping ban I didn’t buy a lot though. (Compared to my usual Halloween shopping habits, but was a bit weak on my ban, but it is Halloween season and for that I did good… Maybe will do a haul post / video within the next weeks?)
list-bat-png Wondering why we get random nightmares, I do understand when something related to the topic happens in your life those days but I don’t remember having a bad experience with my teeth lately (got them done after 10 years of fear and panick attacks on my way to the dentist in 2015) and now I had a nightmare about them being the way they used to be over night and doctors telling me they could not do anything about it anymore. Ugh, so happy it was just a dream!
list-bat-png My facebook feed somehow exploded, Rob Zombie was futured on a vegan something cover. Being vegan is not a bad thing but somehow there are people you would not think that they were vegan unless you follow them on social media, good to know though!

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This month I had nearly no freetime due to job hunt, so I am a month behind answering your lovely comments even though I’ve read them all but since I also want to visit your blogs when you comment on something those comments will have to sleep a little longer… Sorry for that, I will catch up as soon as real life is coming back to normal! I also am aware of the fact that there was a lack of posts and a lack of everything (and a lack of links and music in this monthly random post) and I am afraid, I don’t know how much I will be able to do for the blog in October since the job hunt was successful ( very ❤ , yay! ) and now I have to look for a flat 200kms away from my current home. This means to drive 2-3hrs x2 each time that there is a flat to look at / to apply for (maybe 2-3 times a week). Since I am still working fulltime as well you can immagine how little time is left for everything else (aka packing, meeting friends, blogging, sleep,…) Please wish me luck for the flat thing is driving me insane!

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What has been inspiring for you this September? Any plans for October? Have a nice evening!

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